Thursday, November 26, 2009


I am so very very Thankful for all the goodness that God has blessed me and my little family cup runneth over.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Righting My World

Hello...Thanks for have reached cranky, Ren Inc. may I help you?
Goodness this baby of his's the lil pearly whites making their debut but still....and crying...crying but not for real...cause he can't have his way...oh my! I was hoping this fit throwing might hold off for a couple more months a least but no....
Last night at dinner he wanted to hold the spoon...and put his hand out every-time to grab it....which all-in-all is not that big of a deal but it was dinner time and this Mama needs her boy to lean that dinner time is for eating and not playing. So I told Ren no and then tried to keep feeding him. 30 (or so give or take a few) No's later...Ren is crying...but not real tears...just peeking out at Mama every-now-and-then to see if I am paying attention and then when he sees me looking at him he smiles and goes for the spoon...Ha...sneaky lil guy. So, I let him "cry" and just sat there waiting for him to finish. Then when he was done I gave him a couple bites of food and then went and got a little wooden spoon for him to hold while he finished eating...and finish eating dinner he did. I just have to keep telling myself that my will is greater than his!

And in the middle of all the fits and non tear inducing crying and I am frustrated...Ren gives me a lil ole grin....and my world it is righted again...
the end.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Ren Wearing

Stephanie over at Adventures in Babywearing asked to see our favorite babywearing photos....
I don't have very many of Ren and I but this one....
is easily one of my favorites so far (Ren is 7 months old). This is a Baby K'tan carrier...and my carrier of choice for wearing Ren. It is comfortable, easy to put on and take off and Ren loves it. Here is a picture of me wearing Ren when he was 5 days old his first time in the Baby K'tan...
Goodness he was so little....He slept for 4 hours in there and I LOVED it! I am so glad that there are comfortable carriers out there and I intend to wear Ren as long as he loves it too!

Sunday, October 25, 2009


I'm sure you have had them...THOSE days that just happen to come along and something is not least not right with yourself...the rest of the house and everyone in it are just humming right along and you are left standing there wondering 'What the heck? and WHY?'
Well that day was today for me...not wanting to get out of bed at 6:30 to nurse Ren, not wanting to get up and dressed so he can play at 7:15. Twice hoping to lay down and nap when he napped and he only slept for 15-20 minutes. Hubs had a big final paper due today so I couldn't ask him for too much help so I felt like I was on my own for most of the day (which is not a big deal because I am on my own almost everyday it was just that today was Sunday and I wanted a small break). So I ended up crying over the kitchen sink...for no apparent reason...ha...I can think of a million reasons but none of them are good ones that merit me salting the dishwater. So I sniffed back the annoying tears and gave Ren to Ed...a small escape to the grocery store alone would be good....and then I got a cart with the wonky wheel...guess it was just not my day at all....and while I could go on and on about the "stuff" from today but I don't want to re-hash it and I am sure you don't want to read all my complaining.

After the tears and complaining that was going on in my head...the fact (and it is a fact) that I hate my house...I really do...I could list all the things about it that drive me crazy....but then I feel selfish and ungrateful and spoiled. There are lots of people in this world with out...With out running water, electricity, a kitchen, counters, carpet on the floor...a floor at all..
...all the things that made me want to scream about today...there is so many people with out those same things that would love what I have. It's all about perspective right?

So, I hope to go to bed and wake up tomorrow to a much better day....Cheers to Monday!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Pumpkin Time!

Being a Christian; "It is like being a pumpkin. God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. Then he cuts off the top and scoops out all the yucky stuff. He removes the seeds of doubt, hate, greed, etc., and then He carves you a new smiling face and puts His light inside of you to shine for all the world to see."

What a wonderful poem....I don't know who wrote it but I like it!

We took Ren to his first Pumpkin Patch this past weekend.
I can't say he loved it....he could have cared less...hahaha..the things we do....
He did eat some grass and choked on a pumpkin stem...freaked me out to say the least (hubs was on baby duty btw, he did not think it was THAT BIG!). I do want to buy a wagon for Ren now, he really enjoyed the little wagon ride....just sat there all big boy like and took the world in.
We also had our first swing (sitting on Mama's lap) the other day and Ren loved that too. I was hoping to take him back to the park but the weather has not been that great.

Ren's sleep is getting much better (his nights) we have settled into a nice routine for the evening and he is sleeping through the night...YAY!!! Naps however are are a whole different story round here. So, that is what we are working on.....getting Ren to nap in his bed....the last two days have involved a lot of crying (Ren) and massive amounts of frustration and stress (me). But he did nap for 30 minutes (much much much crying) this morning and 45 this afternoon (a lot less crying). So I just have to be consistent and persistent with him and I believe that he will start napping much better.

We are still gearing up for the big move to SC and hubs is preparing for training and deployment. Keeping the house clean, organizing "stuff" and preparing lists of what Ren and I will need to take with us is what is keeping me busy busy around here.

Big breath in....the holiday season that is almost here...Loving on my hubs and spending as much family time around here as possible is what occupies my mind and time....and that is a good thing!
Can you believe we are more that half way through October? Where oh where is the time going?

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

6 Have Flown

It's been a while...once again. Just finding time to sit down and put some thoughts together has proven itself a challenge around here. Ren is keeping me on my toes, Mama work is weary work, but a good weary (weary weary weary weary weary...say that a couple times in a row and see if you don't sound like Bugs Bunny).

My little fighter is sleeping better, we have adjusted his night time routine...dinner at 6, then bath, then a little play time, prayers with Dada, then off to his room for a book, nursing, rocking and singing...I am out of the room by 8:20 (we are hoping to push this up a little so he is asleep by 7:30ish but considering he was going to bed 9:30-10ish, we are doing good) He is not crying very long (thank the Lord in heaven) and is waking about 5:30 in the morning for nursing and then back to sleep until 7 something. So YAY...I am a little less stressed.

Nap time however is now the battle we are fighting, Ren sleeps a couple times a day (3 to 4) about 30 to 45 minutes each...and in his I would like to get him to two long naps (ya know one morning, one afternoon and in his bed) (so I can get some stuff done around here)). Oh and my sweet boy had his six month appointment....he is 16pds 13 oz and 26 1/2 inches long. In his 6 to 9 (or to 12) size clothes. He is sitting up like a champ, loves his jumpy and has the best giggles! We started him on solids and he is eating; sweet potatoes, pears, avocado, banana, mango and cereal...we are trying new things every 4 days. No teeth budding up just yet and he always has his fingers in his mouth.

Ren's 6 month appointment photo

We are getting some stuff done around here...going through closets and organizing spaces to prepare for a move (to SC) and possibly a pack-out and move (to a new base) this coming year. I can hardly believe that half a year has flown by, when the nurse was weighing Ren I could not help but think about our first appointment with them and how little Ren was and how tired I was and worried. Worried that I was doing something wrong, not nursing enough, holding him too much or too little...and a dozen other thoughts swirling in my head and heart.

How did you tackle naps with your little ones?

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


Today my heart
it spilled
wet tears of joy
down my cheeks.

I can't believe that I have a son!
One of my very own to love and nurture,
to watch him grow and
guide him as he discovers the world.

I am so blessed and filled
with the wonder of being
his Mama.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Just around the bend

Big changes just around the bend here in my paradise. Hubs is headed to Afghanistan in March but has an almost 3 month training starting the beginning of January...he will be gone until October sometime. So Ren, Elliot, Austin and I are moving to South Carolina while he is gone. This whole time is bittersweet as I am looking forward to seeing my sisters (I have 7 of them), their families, my parents and all my friends back home...but will miss my Hubs achingly while we are apart. I never really understood the sacrifice that our military men, women and their families make for our freedoms until I become one of those families. Hubs is going to miss a great deal of wonder-filled firsts with Ren and that makes my heart hurt just thinking about it. Ren will probably not really know his daddy when he returns although we have quite a few plans up our sleeves so that he will "see" his daddy everyday.

I am planning on taking a few creative classes while I am in SC, a cake decorating class, a pottery class and if I can find it a stained glass or blowing glass class, I am looking forward to tapping into my creative side and learn new things. I also have lots of fabric for a quilt (yes the very same fabric from sometime last summer) and I am taking all my beading and jewelry making stuff. With this move looming in the near future and lots to do to prepare for it. I am not sure about what to do for the holidays round here.

I'm ready to decorate for Fall, but do I get all the stuff out for it and then transition to Thanksgiving and Christmas? I just can't decide. A part of me just wants to keep the next thirteen weeks ( as simple as possible and another part of me wants to go all out...this is Ren's firsts after all.

On top of everything else we might be selling the house while we are away so I need to make it ready to "show" and make sure everything is in its proper place so if we are packed out (the movers come) while we are away I won't have too many surprise boxes (nothing like opening a box that has kitchen written on it and there is nothing in it that should ever go in the kitchen). We are going to have to go through our storage room and attic and give/sale/donate the "stuff" that has accumulated in the past 2.5 years (not to mention the boxes that we tote around from house to house but never open to use the contents).

I don't know if I am ready for all the work ahead...I know that I am going to have to use my time very wisely the next couple months so I can get everything done and not be stressed when we are ready to move.
We don't know where we might move to next year...I am anticipating something good (I hope) and just trying to take all these changes in stride.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Sleep oh please sleep...

Oh my sweet baby is a fighter. This boy does not want to go to sleep. We got back from a week vacation and every time I put him down after he has fallen asleep from nursing he wakes right up and starts crying. So last night DH put him down and the poor thing cried all night(with us checking on him every 15 minutes)....I cried too. When he woke from finally sleeping around 4:45am I got up and got him, nursed and let him sleep with me, I simply couldn't imagine him crying the morning away. So DH is checking on him every 15 minutes and tells him he is loved and rubs his tummy....and still he cries and cries and cries. Tonight he went down at 8:34pm it's 9pm and he is still crying....Oh my Lord....I do not like this. I don't want him to depend on me to go to sleep and I do not want him sleeping with us but I do not like for him to cry like this. Everything we have read tells us that this will take a week or less...I sure hope so, I don't know if my lil mama heart can take much more of this crying.
So, any advice? Did you let your little ones cry to sleep? How long did it take?

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


Some days just rush by
and others
they are slow
and sometimes there is
loveliness in those slow days
not a dragging by
but time spent sitting
with a sweet babe on my lap
he is sleepy and wants to nurse
and instead of rushing
trying to accomplish
this or that
that or this
i get to sit
and marvel
at these slow days
at the wonder of being
being a mama
the beauty of my babe
the day.

Sunday, July 26, 2009


There is Magic in these moments, my days are quickly passing by....

We have settled into some nice predictable days here....I wouldn't say a schedule...I am not a schedule type Mama at all. But Ren is sleeping for 6 to 8 hours a night, breastfeeding and taking his naps during the day well....
Our days go something like this
7-7:30am wake up, diaper change, then we head to the floor for play time
8:30-45ish nurses and down for naps
10:30ish up from naps, diaper change, get dressed for the day and off to do errands
between 12 and 1; nurses, has playtime then down for naps
around 3-3:30 up from naps, diaper change and then more errands or playtime, reading, helping (watching) mama clean, etc...
by 5pm usually nursing, then more playtime, helping Mama or playing with Daddy
diaper change
7pm nursing , quiet play, reading
8pm bathtime
massage, PJ's, books, prayers, nursing
Ren falls asleep between 9 and 10pm and sleeps until between 4 or 6am, nurses and goes back to sleep.
So this Mama can't complain too much. I love these days...seems like there is magic in the air, Ren's giggles, sighs, babbles and sweet baby snuggles are the best! I knew that I would love being a Mama....but I had no idea the depth of this...of these magic days of love.....
Ren and his new Snuggle Bunny from Nova Naturals, I love their stuff and after looking through their many things to buy for Ren as he grows and discovers the world around him.

I am planning on introducing Ren to solids between his 6th and 7th month and am reading (Super Baby Food by Ruth Yaron) and preparing to start making his food. I am excited about this transition that is coming up but am not looking forward to the change in poo....yuck!

Speaking of cloth diapers are still going fabulous...I wash every other day some times every third day and the clothing line outside is a huge time saver. None of the things that I stressed about (getting build up, using the wrong detergent, the diapers retaining smell) have happened and I am loving the Organic Bum Genuis more than I initially thought that I would. They are super absorbent, less bulky and I do not have to stuff them. Although they take longer to dry then the others hanging them outside eliminates that issue altogether.

We already talk of adding to our family..and as much as I want to I know that I am not ready just yet.....and still exclusively breast feeding helps me not stress too much about getting pregnant as my chances are pretty low. If we do, we do...I just don't want to take anytime away from Ren right now. I know that time is fleeting and I will never have this time again...the time of only one child to give my time too. I love the time I get to spend with Ren and the magic of each and every day that we have.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

One Year Later!

Fourth of July 2008 was a weird one....Hubby had recently returned from Iraq (to which I was abundantly grateful), we were recovering emotionally from a failed adoption ((hubby was still in Iraq) I had that sweet baby for 5 days...home from the hospital...when the birth-mother changed her mind), we were on infertility meds yet again (for the umpteenth time in 5 years) and my cycle had just started which meant that we were not pregnant once again. I was missing my family and overwhelmed with the prospects/decisions in front of us. Do we continue fertility meds? Do we do another IUI procedure? Do we stop "trying" all together? Do we continue our adoption paperwork and try to adopt again? Do we just stop everything? We wanted to start our little family so much. There we were sitting in this big open field, waiting for an awesome fireworks running all around us...and me tears running down trying to take it all in and sending up silent prayers to God...asking for a sweet baby...
And here we are one year later...July 2008 was the month that we conceived Ren...he is now 3 1/2 months old and we could not imagine our lives with out this little miracle boy. God saw my tears and answered my prayers!
Here we are, that same field, exactly one year later! God is so wonderful to us!!!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009


Well, it sure has been a while...we have been quite busy here in our little Paradise...Ren is fully cloth diapered now...we are loving the Bum Genius 3.0 diapers....I love the colors too! We end up washing diapers every other day and Hubs has hung a laundry line for me so these little babes are hanging dry in my backyard every other day.
Ren is 13 weeks baby is 3 months old! Time is just flying by. We have traveled quite a bit since the last 2 weeks of May....we have made trips to Paris, TX; Prattville, AL; Columbia, SC; Greenville SC; Rutherfordton, NC; Atlantic Beach, NC and next week San Antonio, TX. I think that will be the last trip (aside from some weekend trips back to Paris) for quite a while. Ren has traveled more in his first 3 months than most little ones I know....I'm not sure if that makes us crazy or just busy on the go people.
We have settled into a bit of a routine around here (even with all the traveling) and Ren is sleeping through the night (most nights). I am still adjusting to time management and getting house keeping done. I am hoping to get some of the furniture in the house re-arranged to make the spaces seem bigger, less cluttered and house keeping a little easier.
We are still exclusively breast feeding...something that has gotten much easier and a lot less stressful as the weeks have gone by. Reading books, singing songs, helping me with the dishes (you know watching from the bouncy chair), learning to cook and fold laundry...hahaha....are all things that are keeping Ren and I very busy....and then there are; play dates, lunches with Daddy and friends, grocery shopping and running errands....Ren is learning a lot!
I love watching Ren discover the world around him and can't wait to show him more and more!
Oh...and I got the new iPhone! Very exciting...mucho pictures and an awesome app called Baby Brain that is helping me track Ren's sleep habits and times, diapers and nursing times.
We are just scooting along.....excited about the 4th of July celebrations this weekend and fireworks!
I hope you have a safe and happy 4th of July!

Friday, June 19, 2009

7 Quick Ones

If I could take the roof off and shake everything out of my house (into neat organized piles of course) so that I could reorganize and place what I want/need where I want/need it and store or get rid of the rest. I so want to reorganize my house and with a 10 week old step at a time.

Holidays are wonderful..coming back from the holidays to the pile of laundry and a house that was left in a hurry because of circumstances outside of our control...not so wonderful. I wanted to leave with everything sparkly clean....not so much this go around.

Communication...Communication...Communication...seems as though every aspect of life (personal and spiritual) bode well when there is proper communication going on. Aurgh not looking forward to a couple communications that will hopefully set everything right.

Routine....that's what I am attempting to settle into with Ren, he is sleeping pretty well at night for the most part (except last night) to get his day napping, playing, eating....into a predictable routine.

We are officially in all cloth diapers as of today! I was waiting for Ren to be big enough for the Bum Genius 3.0 to fit him leaks please...and now that we are home from our long summer holiday and I have (know that I have) a washer and dryer (the place we stayed at the beach said that there was a washer/dryer in the was on the 1st floor (we were on the 3rd) and it cost $3 per load) glad we ended up using disposables, I was going to use cloth).

We are doing salads and grilling for dinners this summer, trying to keep everything as light as possible....hubby complains about weight gain (just the normal "your life has now changed" there is a baby and wifey is not cooking as much and we have been out of any normal routine...weight gain) and I am pretty much what I weighed before getting pregnant minus a few pounds and would like to keep it off as well as lose some more.

I was hoping that we would get an assignment and get to move this summer/fall....looks like we may be staying here till next summer....I was hoping to it would help me reorganize the house...LOL

Check out Jen she hosts & Quick Takes Friday!


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

home from the summer holiday...

home from holiday...check
never wanting to do a long drive across the country with an infant again...check
mail gone through...check
bills paid...check
grocery shopping finished...check
car at dealership getting checked out...check (thank goodness for warranties)
crying babe nursed...check
that same babe down for nap...check

now to...
put away groceries
sort laundry
process laundry
clean bathrooms
clean kitchen
clean floors
organize guest room/study
organize coat closet
purge house of non-needed stuff
organize house
modify the babes schedule for better naps, playing, eating and sleeping
bathe dog
download holiday pics

and the list goes on and on....

Monday, May 11, 2009


I find myself singing to Ren a song my Mom sang and I am almost certain each of my sisters have sung to their little ones. It is not one of the classic lullabies but I love the song...

Acres of Diamonds
words & music by Arthur Smith

Acres of diamonds, mountains of gold,
Rivers of silver, jewels untold;
All these together, wouldn't buy you or me
Peace when we're sleeping or a conscience that's free.
A heart that's contented, a satisfied mind,
These are the treasures, money can't buy;
If you have Jesus, there's more wealth in your soul,
Than acres of diamonds, mountains of gold

Each time I sing it to Ren I am reminded that there is nothing like having Jesus in your heart. There is nothing better than peace when we are sleeping, a free conscience, a content heart and a mind that is satisfied. I feel like this song is a prayer of sorts also that I am praying over Ren, that he will know and have a personal relationship with Jesus and that he will have all of the things that this song tells us about too.

Are there any special lullabies that you sing/have sung to your little ones?

Friday, May 8, 2009

the cycle...

we have hit the 6th week growth spurt...whew...this mama is wore out!
Ren is crying because he is tired
tired because he is wanting milkies
wanting milkies because he has hit a growth spurt
he has hit a growth spurt and so this mama is tired

lets hope this will be the short 2-3 day spurt and not a week long one

when he is not crying or nursing or sleeping i get one of these...
and somehow well the crying, non-sleeping , wanting to nurse all-the-freaking-time does not seem quite so bad.
this boy has some personality just a bloomin!

Thursday, May 7, 2009


my mornings of sweet boy snuggles....nothing better in the world....

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

5 weeks....on Tuesday

I can hardly believe that my lil guy is FIVE weeks old today (I started this post on Tuesday). It seems like just last week we were bringing him home for the first time. Well not just last week...haha...I would be a little less sleep deprived.
The first couple weeks with him have been an adjustment and I feel like we are fairing pretty well. Ren wore his cloth diapees for the first time last week, too cute!
He only wore them for the day though...his legs are still a bit to skinny for them...we had gaps and while they didn't leak any pee I am afraid of the mess I would have on my hands with poo.
We have had a couple nights of good sleep...thank you baby! we moved Ren to his crib on Monday night and he slept so much better. I am kinda sad to have him in the other room already but....he sleeps better and so do I. Nursing is getting better...Ren is nursing more proficiently and I am feeling more positive about it every day.
I am so excited about seeing his little personality bloom....he makes the best faces already.
What a wonderfilled 5 weeks this has been...I am loving this Mama stuff...

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

3 weeks today...

My baby...he is sleeping right now...which is a good thing. He is sleeping in the bouncy chair, the same bouncy chair he slept so well in yesterday...the very same chair he would not sleep in last night. I don't understand this...this night thing....of not sleeping well. I worry it is that he is not getting enough breast milk, maybe I am not awake enough to ensure that he gets a full belly so he nibbles all night long....which makes for a tired Mama. I am okay by 10am usually...and then need an afternoon nap with him so I can do the nights. Hubby has taken to the guest room bed.....and I don't blame him...I worried about his sleep and it is better for me to stay in the room then try to get comfortable in the living room. So, today I am going to try to keep him up a little...not so many nice naps...maybe that will help his night sleeps. We do the whole bright lights, outdoor walks it's DAY TIME little one and then soft voices, low lights and not much interaction for night.

We head to the doc tomorrow to weigh in again. I am hoping and praying that Ren has gained the required 4 oz or more. He seems to be a growing and content baby...if he was not getting enough milkies than I am sure he would be a crying non-sleeping, not-content little boy.

Any advice..I've been reading lots....but you know babies don't come with an instruction manual and if they did...well every manual would have to be different. We are partly co-sleeping after the initial wake up around 1-2am Ren stays with me...but I worry about him sleeping with me and although I know that co-sleeping will work...the problem is that Ren is not getting sleep from that first wake up (1-2am) until 7 or 8 am. We are going to try the crib...with out the sleep positioner (it has a slight incline) for naps today.

So...yeah..any advice for this new tired mama? I sure would appreciate it.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Friday, April 17, 2009

7 Quick Takes (April 17)

I did not know that breastfeeding would stress me out this much...I worry over Ren, I knew that as a Mama I would worry over him (that started the moment I knew I was pregnant). But with his weight at birth: 7pd 8oz, week 1: 6pds 10oz, week 2: 6pds 14oz...the doc said that his weight gain was slow but was not worried as long as he gained 1/2 oz a day. I just worry over him...getting enough milk, sleeping well, enough poo diapers...I have been praying over Ren and also for peace and Mama wisdom.

My house is a mess...these floors need vacuumed and mopped, the bathrooms...the laundry...augh...I am keeping up with the dishes though and the recycling makes it to the correct containers in the garage. I am hoping to get in a groove here so that the housework does not seem so overwhelming.

Ren is an easy baby so far...aside from just not sleeping well at night...he is pretty restless and does not stay down for more than 2 hours. So we have some snuggle time in the morning after he eats and I let him sleep on my chest....I so love this sweet time and know that it is fleeting.

We bought the ingredients for the meals that I wanted to have made before Ren's arrival. Now to just carve out the time to make them. I am hoping that I can work on them one at a time during Ren's awake time in the afternoon. He is pretty content to sit in the bouncy chair and look around while I talk to him.

Elliot is feeling a bit left out... he wants to get on the chair or ottoman when I am feeding Ren...I don't want him on the baby blankets...he just looks at me a little sad and curls up on the floor beside the chair. My sweet sorry Elliot.

Reading the blogs about sick babies and families that have lost their little ones....I just can't do it anymore...I know that this loss happens daily...I just get overwhelmed and stressed by it all.

Oh and check out Jen at Conversion Diary.

Friday, April 10, 2009

this or this....

so...this is growing in my hallway....
Elliot is the only one here who does not want this mountain tackled....he is rather fond of this growing bed. My plan today was/is to reduce this mountain...then Hubby noticed a leaky faucet in the backyard and turned the water instead I get this.....
Sweet baby... I love baby-gazing...this boy son...he is so beautiful. Now if he would just get his days and nights straightened out. 1am-4am...hello..Mama, I don't want to sleep....rather Daddy...because thank goodness...Daddy has had 2weeks off and someone is making sure Mama gets a little sleep. But, Daddy heads back to work on sweet boy will be two weeks by then....and we have to figure this out.
Trying to get this Mama thing down....stressing about breast feeding, Ren's weight gain, getting enough sleep, little bit of jaundice to work itself out, just wanting to be a good Mama...
I felt like I had failed Ren somehow when his one week weight was 6 pds 10 oz, his birth weight was 7pds 8 oz, a couple more oz lost than the doc likes to see...we go in again on Wednesday for another weigh the meantime this Mama is working hard to make sure this boy eats...and eats long enough to get the hinds milk.
I know we will get this and figure it all out and Ren will be a fat little baby in no time and I will get my Mama-legs under the mean time...
I will just do some peaceful baby-gazing and enjoy my cuddle-bug....

Monday, April 6, 2009

6 Days New

I've been waiting to wear this guy on the outside for 9 months...He loved the Baby K'tan wrap and so did I!

Friday, April 3, 2009

Sweet Surprise

BOTH my boys are sleeping...
Who knew that after my last post on the 30th that I would have my sweet baby the next day? I sure didn't! Needless to say the 10 other things on my To Do list are still To Do, although I did get the wall hanging up in the nursery! And those fabulous dinners I hoped to have waiting for a hungry hurried day in the freezer...not so much...but that is exchange I received this....
Ren was born at 11:57 am on Tuesday, 31 March...weighing in at 7pds 8oz and 19.5 inches long. He decided to arrive 10 days before his due date...which was okay by me....except I still have that To Do list...I guess I will always have a To Do list.
So Monday night...after hanging the nursery wall hanging, making dinner, cleaning the kitchen and fretting over The List and how much time I had water was around 11pm. So a call to my Mama...for prayer, a call to the hospital to verify that I should head in, a bag to pack, dogs to let out and in and a hubby to wake...started this whole birth experience. We settled into L&D around 2am, IV started...I was not dilated at all...I could only think that this was going to be a loooong day (you know they say 1st births are looooong). 6am...not quite 2 cm...drugs upped, lights dim, Hubby praying...for strength, wisdom and peace. 8am doc comes to see me...drugs upped again...3 cm...this is going to be a long day...that is all I could think of...I need to keep my strength I asked for something to take the edge off. In and out with contractions...Hubby counting with me, watching the rolling hills on the monitor...encouraging me...loving me. 10am no check...the pain was getting intense, still bearable but not quite able to rest anymore. I thought...Oh ...I am going to be in labor until tonight at least and this pain is only going to increase...I don't know if I can take might be too I asked for the epidural. Hoping for some relief by 11am. Well, 11am came and went..."you are next in line...there are a couple who requested ahead of you" breathe..count....squeeze my Man's more rolling hills now spiky plateaus...the it felt like someone was wringing my body out and trying to tear it in two at the same time. 11:30am..."we just need to get this other bag of fluid in are next for the epidural"...11:45am "honey I need to check you and see how far you are before they can do the epidural"... ARE YOU KIDDING ME...the bed goes flat..the pain shoots up. Wide eyed nurse exclaims..."you are ready to deliver this baby"! I lose it...crying, screaming (yes..I was that scary lady screaming in the delivery room) I am not ready...mentally not ready...Get it together...we can do this...we can do this...he is almost here...just 10 more minutes..and after 1 minute then only 9 more to go...then 8...I can do this. Doc comes in...people scrambling around preparing the room. Okay time to push...Roll up like a ball...deep breath...I remember...A Baby Story...I can do this...5 pushes and Ren is on my chest. Sweet relief...HE.IS.BEAUTIFULl! I can't believe that I have done this...that he was living and growing inside of me. And my CHAMPION...he took such sweet care of me..even though he was just as scared as I was.
So we are home..adjusting, gazing at this boy in wonderment...tag teaming for sleep...requiring patience as we learn him. This is wonderful!

Monday, March 30, 2009

Preperation and Progress

Long time no post...yep, I am still here...just nothing new going on.....well nothing new aside from my belly getting bigger and bigger and we are now 11 days from my due date. ELEVEN DAYS! I can't believe how fast this has gone by...I know that I have said that time and time again but really...this has been so quick.

Almost done with the nursery, just a wall hanging to hang, a crib skirt to find, a lamp to buy and some stars to decoupage (I think). I was going to do a whole vintage cowboy thing and then well everything is so expensive and I did not want to buy stuff that would be just used for a baby room...and I wanted to use stuff that we already had. We ended up with a colorful room for this lil' guy. The walls were painted a cream color, red went on the dresser and a mirror that hangs over the changing table, dark blue curtains were hung and a bench covered in dark brown corduroy. The wall hanging is from Turkey and a patchwork of colorful wool squares of red, blue, yellow and green. The mobile is already hanging over the crib, I love the colors, the feathers trimmed and shaped into airy flying butterflies. This week we plan to finish up the nursery and I can't wait to show you pictures!

I have printed off recipes for the freezer meals and will be making those Wednesday and Thursday of this week. I am hoping to have at least 10 meals ready to defrost and some freezer bags filled with pancakes and waffles for a quick breakfast (so glad I still have three frozen containers of blueberries). I am making these enchiladas and this chicken spaghetti casserole both from both dishes I have made before, frozen and have eaten recently...I forgot how good they are! I am also making Lasagna, Pork and Sour Cream Enchiladas along with this enchilada recipe...which I you should try it!
(do you think I have enough enchiladas???)

Chicken Tomatillo Black Bean Enchiladas
by Nili

You will need:
White Corn tortillas
Can of black beans
small can of chopped green chiles
one supermarket rotisserie chicken (southwest flavor if they have it)
jar of Pace's new Tequila Lime Salsa
Kraft (or any kind) 4 cheese Mexican blend (2 cups)
6 or so tomatillos

de-bone and shred or cut chicken into small pieces
drain and rinse black beans
take paper-like husk off of tomatillo, rinse well and dice into bite size pieces, (if you have never tasted or cooked with these before they should be firm, bright green and will have a little stickiness to them when you take the husk off, they have a lemony/lime like flavor)

chicken, black beans, green chiles, 1 cup of cheese and the diced tomatillos
Pour enough salsa to lightly coat the bottom of your pan.
Pour the salsa that is left into a shallow bowl.

Dip the corn tortilla (some find it easier to soften the tortilla in the micro for a couple of seconds wrapped in a damp paper towel) in the salsa coating both sides, then place in pan, place some of the chicken mix in the center of the tortilla and then roll the tortilla placing overlapping sides down. Continue until you have filled the pan, then spread the remaining cup of cheese over the top.

Seven things are left on my To Do list (I did have 17 whooohooo 10 down) I hope to have everything crossed off by the end of this week so I can make sure the house and all the regular upkeep...dusting, vacuuming and laundry are caught up before I go into labor. So hopefully!

Walking a lot and trying to stay busy...the anticipation is building..I can't wait to meet this little growing miracle!
There are still several things on the list to buy for baby but we can get them after...diapers are washed and ready along with his cute clothes and blankets and stuff...
So just waiting and preparing...glad to see progress!

Friday, March 13, 2009

7 Quick Takes (Vol 2)

The last 4 week countdown is here....we are finishing up all the "stuff" and hubby said last night that he is going to miss rubbing the Buddha Belly every night...I think I am going to miss those belly rubs too!

I made a hominy side dish last night that was delish...the recipe went something like this...
1 can hominy
1 cup sharp cheddar cheese, grated
1 egg
1/4 cup plus a little more perhaps of milk
1 4oz can of diced green chiles
a bit of salt and fresh ground pepper
a couple slices of bacon cooked and drained
~Mix hominy, egg, milk, green chiles, salt, pepper and most of the cheese together.
~Place mixture in a oven safe dish, oven preheated to 350 F or so.
~Crumble bacon over top of mixture and then the rest of the cheese.
~Cover and cook ( I think it was in the oven for 35-45 minutes)
Yum this was SO good.

My sweet friend Amy and her family are in China right now adopting a sweet girl...Lillian Joy....follow their journey here.

It is rainy here again plan is to stay in my pajamas for the day (if possible). I do need to paint the mirror that is going in the nursery (may require non pj clothing). Did I say it was cold is..COLD...not cold enough for ice or snow but cold enough to make it not worth my while to get out in it.

We have big cross country trip coming up the end of May lasting through the middle of June. Our lil' guy will be in his second month and although I am sure he will travel well...I am already making lists and planning out how this may/may not go....and all this time I thought that I was not a "list girl".

Speaking of To Do list is not really getting any shorter although I feel like I am making progress. Lots of organizing to do before this baby arrives, mostly the closets and the guest room...not to mention the pantry...My item off the list per day...I feel like the little engine that could....I think I can, I think I can...hopefully the list will be crossed off before the big delivery day.

I have a hair appointment next week and am going back to blond...I like the brown for a while but then I want to be blond again. So (this picture was last summer) I will be a blond again after Tuesday....oh and on Tuesday I have my BIG start of the 9th month OB appointment. Maybe I will have started to dilate and efface....maybe...hopefully...

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Sunday, March 8, 2009

33 DAYS to go!

I've been waiting for the weather to warm up so I could wear this top. I bought it at least 12 years ago at a 2nd hand shop for next to nothing. I have worn it before but never while pregnant...and that is what it is a maternity top. 33 DAYS....I am so excited, a little nervous, a little scared but mostly blown away by the wonder of this creation that has been growing inside of me. I can't wait to meet my Son!

Thursday, March 5, 2009

7 Quck Takes Friday

I can hardly believe that I am under 5 weeks now to giving birth and becoming a Momma. Reading birth stories, praying for my labor and delivery and making way too many lists in my head of everything that needs to be accomplished before this lil' guy makes his debut. Hubby and I started our "birth class" last night and while I felt like I already knew a lot of the information I am so glad that we went. It helped Hubby realize the reason for some of the birth plan choices I have made and agree with me...yippeee for that!

Here are just a couple of my favorite photos from our recent holiday to Sedona, AZ

I am planning out some dinners to make and freeze in the next couple of weeks so that Hubby won't have to worry about dinner every night after our lil' guy arrives. So far I have 3 different enchilada recipes and some lasagna on my list...I'll take any ideas you might have!

We have decided to use Cash/Check ONLY for everything. This includes not using the debit card. I stressed a little about this but I know that doing this will make me more aware of the money I spend...nothing like seeing the green leave your wallet and your "bank" get too low before payday.

If you have never visited Jennifer you should, she is the host of 7 Quick Takes Friday.

The nursery is almost complete, hopefully we will have everything done by next weekend. I can't wait to see it all come together and post some pictures.

I have a two page list of TO DO that I need to get cracking on...ya'll have a great weekend!

Monday, February 16, 2009


~6 years ago today hubby and I married.....marrying him is the smartest and most wonderful things I could ever do for myself....I L. O. V. E. My Love

~My baby belly has gotten SO BIG....I cannot fathom how much larger it will grow in the next 7 weeks and 3 days.

~Our holiday to Sedona AZ last week was wonderful.

~We bought paint for the nursery today.

~Forgiveness and Love are powerful and wonderful.

~This little guy in my belly is having a party..I think.

~It's 11:33pm and I should be sleeping.

~We have decided to keep the lil' guy's name a secret...I LOVE his name!

~My sister is flying in to see me for almost 2 weeks!

~I have no idea why I am writing this post this way.

~I made the yummiest Apple Pecan Bread yesterday.

~Nothing is better than clean shiny newly mopped floors...well unless you did not have to mop them....and your back hurts....but the shine and smell are worth it.

~Heartburn is from hell.

~I need to clear my dining room table of all the paperwork that came out of the office that is now the nursery.

~I did not buy a Valentine or an Anniversary card this year for my hubby...he always forgets to buy me one and then when I give him mine he feels bad and I get I decided to skip the whole card thing this year...he never felt bad and I never felt sad.

~Hubby brought me breakfast in bed this morning....he is very sweet.

~I can't wait to be a Mom to this lil' guy.

~I hope and pray that I will be an awesome Mom.

~Say HI if you stop by.....


Tuesday, February 3, 2009

What??? We are growing a BOY????

Well...this week has held a surprising beginning. We had our 30 week Ultrasound on Monday and guess what????? We are NOT having a GIRL! We are having a BOY! While I was unable to see the monitor very well...ya know they have you laying down and the screen was not pointed in (my) the right Mr. Wonderful was able to see everything and this growing babe is a BOY with out a doubt. I am not really surprised...whenever I have just sat and thought about this baby I have always thought BOY...even after the doc was 85% sure we were growing a girl (at a 20 week sonogram). We have waited (thankfully) to decorate the nursery and go all out and buy lots of girlie stuff b/c we wanted to be sure of the gender of this little miracle.

I am a girlie-girl of sorts so a lil' sad to find out that I have to put the couple of cute dresses and shoes away (or save then for some awesome baby gifts) and that I am not going to be a mom to a girl just yet....but...there is nothing like a Momma's boy!

My little guy is measuring in the 60th %, 3pds 9oz (approx) 9 weeks and 3 days to go!!! I am nervous and excited. Cloth diapers are bought (although I am exchanging the pink ones for blue ones), I have pretty much everything we need for the first 3 months clothing wise. I had quite a bit of gender neutral stuff and a nice stash of boy stuff from our failed adoption...I actually had more boy stuff then girl stuff after I went through everything yesterday...Hubby is excited about that...ya know less $$ for me to have to spend!

Now we just have to decide on a name and start putting together the little guys room...we are planning a vintage cowboy theme and living here in the heart of Texas well that won't be too hard.

I'd love to know who is stopping by....please say hello with a comment!

Happy Love Month!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Another Wonderful GiveAway

Amanda at ohamanda is hosting a fabulous sling giveaway from Raspberry Baby.
Check her blog out and don't forget to check out Raspberry Baby either...I am in love with their skirts and vintage tag blankie. Awesome Etsy site and wonderful giveaway, Thanks Amanda!

Monday, January 26, 2009


Elliot helped me practice today.....

He is so funny and surprisingly willing to "practice" and I have a lot to learn....

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

28 weeks 5 days

I had the gestational diabetes test today, results come in the form of hopefully NOT hearing from my OB by tomorrow morning. 11 pounds gained so far and lots of heartburn. The Girl's heartbeat was good, lots of movement going on (not surprising with that sugar drink). We have the big 30 week Ultrasound in two weeks, I can't wait to see her and know that she is growing good. This appointment today also started the seeing my OB every two weeks until my 36th week. I spoke to him today about my birth plan and his opinion on a couple things...I feel really good about his answers and the discussion that we had.

The nursery is cleaned out and awaiting new paint...I can't wait to get her little room together! I have several small sewing projects in the works...mostly I am holding out until we return from our holiday to Sedona in February. We have lots and lots planned to do until we return from the holiday and then the lull and I wanted to make sure I have some little projects to look forward to, to help that last month pass a little quicker.

I can't believe how fast this time has gone, I know that I have said this before....and I will say it again. i hope you and yours are having a wonderful first month of 2009!

Peace and Joy!

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Sweet Joy

This weekend Hubby and I attended a local telethon/concert/fundraiser. Hubs won/purchased a much needed gun safe in an auction and I experienced the sweet joy of sharing...which much to Hubs dismay and concern left me quietly crying and then trying to explain...which only helped in bringing a fresh bout of tears (oh fun they are).

Babies are matter the circumstances that bring them into the world...the miracle of life...the newness of a brand new human...JOY! As long as I can remember I have shared the joy of this newness with sisters, family and friends. Sometimes I was the "I will be excited for you, even though I know this is unexpected and you are unsure of everything...a baby after all!" and other times...."lets get a shower together and make sure this new Momma feels special and the family has what they need". No matter how hard for me (infertility for 5 years is a journey in and of itself) when I have heard of a friend becoming a Momma for the 1st or 5th time I am excited...excited for them...for the new life that is created...the process of newness...such joy.

So last night at this concert a woman asked when my baby was due and I shared with her...the JOY that came from overwhelmed me...but in a really good way. She asked if this was my first and then told me congratulations with the biggest smile as though we shared some sort of secret....and I suppose we do although I have never met her before.

I was overwhelmed and still become so when I think about this sharing of sweet joy. For a stranger to share my joy...for my sisters, family and friends to share this miracle of life, this joy and to become a Mama and smile and share in this secret of giving's just sweet joy!

Friday, January 16, 2009

28 weeks down...12 to go

84 more days and counting till due date. I am feeling great. Somewhat tired (I expected this) and sleeping is good as long as I have plenty of pillows for support and don't mind the roll and shuffle to the toilet. Her kicks are getting stronger and her total body movement feels really weird.

I am reading The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding right now. I plan on breastfeeding and would like to exclusively for at least the first 6 months. It amazes me how many women (SAHM) I know choose not to breastfeed their baby...there are a lot that do don't get me something so pure and natural can be discarded so quickly is sad to me (some women cannot, this I know and I also think that if a new Mom does not have support, continuing to breastfeed through pain and complications can be very hard). My Mom fed all eight of her girls and my sisters have all breastfed their children so I never questioned myself...breast or formula...I've always known that I would breastfeed.

Hubby and I are finding new homes for all the stuff that was in the study. Our guest room is now the study/craft room/guest room. We have just about everything for the nursery now, just need to pick out a paint color, paint the dresser and get everything in there and organized. I can't wait to see it all together. We have a fabulous wall hanging and a handmade carpet from our tour in Turkey that I bought with a nursery in mind.

The bumGenius diapers arrived on Wednesday...they are so cute! I am still a little intimidated at the process of cloth diapers but am determined also. I bought 12 and am planning on waiting until I actually try them on her little bum before I buy 12 more. I still have to get the wet bags and a couple more doublers/inserts along with a diaper sprayer. I am also looking for a bum spray/bottom cleaner that I can make myself. The ones that I have seen online are pretty pricey and I know that I read a recipe on a blog somewhere....I just need to find it again.

Hubby and I have a small vacation coming up to Sedona in February (long car ride...but we know I am going to have to stop and walk and pee). When we booked this vacation I was not pregnant...we planned on lots of outdoor hikes and Grand Canyon bliss....that is all going to have to wait, although we can walk to the rim and see! And I think the walking and getting out of the house will be great for me. I will be at the beginning of my eighth month and hope that I will feel good then as I do now.

I hope you are having a fabulous January! oh and by the way....looks like we are staying big moves projected for now!

Peace and Joy!

Friday, January 9, 2009


So...I have had this recipe knocking around my brain for a while and Hubby's parents are visiting so I thought I would try it out...nothing like having a few extra tasters at the table! I have no idea what you would call this dish, maybe an Green Olive and Chicken Spaghetti, I don't know.

Here is what you need, this is for 4 adults:

3 (6 oz) jars quartered & marinated artichokes (drain all but one jar)
1 (10 oz) jar of sliced Spanish Olives with pimientos (well drained)
1 (14.5 oz) can of petite diced tomatoes (well drained)
1 rotisserie chicken ( try to get Italian herb flavor if you can)
Skinny Spaghetti noodles

Here is what to do:
Put water on to boil to cook the noodles
De-bone the chicken and tear into bite size pieces
Add the artichokes, olives, tomato and chicken with the liquid from the 1 jar of artichokes into a skillet or large sauce pan over low/med heat, you will want to just heat up the stuff, not saute it or cause any of the vegetables to break down.
After the noodles are done, drain, add just a tablespoon give or take of Extra Virgin Olive Oil and
toss well.
In a large serving dish add the noodles and the chicken and vegetable mixture ( I left out the sauce that was in the pan) toss and serve while hot. We added a hot loaf of garlic bread and a bottle of white wine.

This could easily be a Vegetarian meal just omit the chicken. This meal took me about 15 minutes from kitchen to table.

Let me know if you try it!

Peace and Joy!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

want one of these...I do!

Mr. Wonderful and I are in need of a new printer...our old one is dead...very dead. So...I am entering this fantastic fabulous Epson Artisan 800 giveaway at Mommy Coddle....ya never know when you might win something.

here, here or here....

My last post....Korea...well that was just a teaser from Mr. Wonderful...he calls me yesterday morning....5 choices...well 6 really
1. stay here
2. Korea
3. Guam
4. Japan
5. Azores
6. Alaska

Oh My...
needless to say yesterday was spent looking up lots and lots of information and talking with my sister, having a long lunch with Mr. Wonderful and more research and more conversation. We narrowed it down to two...which two you ask (all my 3 dear readers) well I am not saying just yet. Hubby has more research to do and more praying needs to happen and well a decision will have to be made but we are not rushed, which is a very lovely thing...Nothing like having to make a where-we-gonna-live choice under the gun of a time crunch.

So, where would you go? Ya know if you had my choices (not really mine you understand...there would be some East coast assignments as well as a couple European ones if they were my choices)...but still....what do you think???

Monday, January 5, 2009


Being a military spouse and living a military life is not "normal" life. Staying put, growing some deep roots, enjoying lifelong friends that live in the same town, having family near by, speaking the same language as those around you...the list goes on and on...

Hubby comes home today and asks what would I think about moving to Korea....hmmm...these little (hmmmph) questions come up every now and then. Geezzz..moving...of course I immediately start looking up information on the base, the housing, trying to find information out there in webland of folks that have lived there recently or are living there.
My first answer is...that would be cool...I mean to live in another foreign country, learn new customs, foods, see more things that I would probably never even think about seeing.

But then....all the other stuff...we are about to have a baby (who would be a couple of months old before we would move) long would we live there (3 years) ....flying (talk about looooong flights)....hmmmm... Korea is in the east so we would leave from the west coast...that would be some long flights to go see family in SC if we moved there.
Am I prepared and willing to live in a little bubble world again (like Incirlik, Turkey)? I wouldn't be able to read Korean, speak Korean or communicate effectively (well I could learn). The housing is high rise backyard...Austin is a Brittney Spaniel (and still a puppy)...he needs lots of running room and his poops are big....this would mean that he would become an inside dog, would he get along with Elliot all day in the house, would Elliot get along with him?....would I be ready for that? How would I decide what minimal amount of stuff from my home that we would pack and take and what would we pack and store? What if we get there, get settled and I don't like it? What if something big happened with North Korea? Would I be ready for all the other "stuff" that living overseas brings? The idea of living on the other side of the world is exciting...and scary at the same time.

The funny thing is...we will probably not move. These possibilities pop up and we have to discuss and do a little research and then think about the big picture...the future...Hubby's career. Sometimes I think if it is good for his career I am on board, however...I am holding out for a European assignment or an East coast one. I really am. Nothing will probably come of our 7 minute conversation tonight about moving to the other side of the world. And if something does I will be a little prepared, just a little.

Oh the joy and adventure of this ride.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Happy New Year!

2009 is already here...seems like 2008 flew by....lots and lots happened in 08...Hubby deployed in January for 4 months to Iraq, I traveled the USA...visiting friends and family...In May right before Mother's Day and a couple weeks before Hubby returned from Iraq I flew from TX to SC to adopt a little boy. My first Mother's was bittersweet. I brought him home on Thursday from the hospital, the birth parents signed the paperwork on Friday and the Monday after Mother's Day the birth mother called to say she changed her mind. Tuesday she went to the lawyer to sign new paperwork revoking the original and I took him to her home Tuesday night. On Friday I was back home in TX...what a whirlwind. Hubby returned, we wept and took care of each other, spoke of this loss and resolved that we would start a family somehow.

After 5 years of unexplained infertility, lots of drugs, shots, procedures, grieving the loss of a would be child month after month, a failed adoption and then the overwhelming thoughts that we would have to start all over again....IT happened. I was late, I thought maybe I am pregnant and then decided I had played that game with myself month upon month, year after year....I should just accept that we were not going to get pregnant. I started to have some light cramping, going to bed in the middle of the cry it out, accept yet another month of lost ability and this promise of a child right outside of my reach...I laid there, grieving, my little Elliot curled up beside me....then will go on....I got up and proceeded to put the disappointment behind me. Late that night after still not starting I decided to take a test...and the rest is as is said history.

I am now on week week away from the start of my third trimester. I am feeling great for the most part. She has changed position recently and the physical feeling of carrying her inside of me has changed. The weight in my pelvic area is new and her movement areas have changed. Last week they were on the sides of my belly and now I feel her more everywhere. I know she has grown by where I can feel her....sometimes I feel movement at the top of my belly and at the same time at the bottom or on one of my sides. I've started to go to bed earlier...not to go to sleep...but sit in the quiet and feel her movement....enjoy the miracle of what is going on inside of me...revel in it...contemplate and allow myself to be absorbed in the idea of a daughter...of me becoming a Mom.

This past 20 plus weeks have been quite the journey. Much to do in preparation for her arrival, diapers to buy and wash, a room to set up, more books to read...more quiet evenings of reveling to enjoy. On New Year's Eve when the clock stuck midnight and my Hubby held me in his arms with our little girl moving in my belly...the THREE of us together...I could not help but marvel at the wonder and newness that this new year is going to be bringing to our door. I've said that 2000 was a wonderful year for favorite so far...I'm pretty sure 2009 will surpass the wonderfulness of 2000 and I can't wait to live this year out!

Peace and Joy!